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| Published: Nov 19, 2008 9:59 AM EST |
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Week 12 Power Rankings |
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- Tennessee Titans (10-0)
Last Week – 1
One dimensional offense huh? In the past two games, Kerry Collins has thrown five TDs while the Titans running game has scored just one. Looks like the Titans have a brand new bag and Vince Young has the weepies.
- NY Giants (9-1)
Last Week – 2
Even though they are No. 2, the Giants are the most complete team in the league. I suggest that losing to the Browns was the best thing for this team. It was a meaningless loss that got the “undefeated” pressure off their back and keeps things in perspective. Think the Titans don’t have pressure to keep their unbeaten streak alive?
- Carolina Panthers (8-2)
Last Week – 3
This team keeps winning and, for the life of me, I can’t figure out why. Oh wait…yes I can! Of their eight wins, five came from the Chargers, Chiefs, Saints sans Reggie Bush, Oakland and Detroit. If that doesn’t sound coosh, then I’m a monkey’s uncle (I never really understood that analogy. How sweet would it be to be the uncle of a monkey? All the bananas you could eat)
- Pittsburgh Steelers (7-3)
Last Week – 5
If not for the leagues first tie since 2002, this game would have been the most putrid game of the week. Nobody wanted to win until the Steelers finally decided that it would look good for them. Did you know this game was the first 11-10 game in NFL history? Do you know why? Because usually teams play good enough that 11-10 would be an embarrassing score.
- Tampa Bay Buccaneers (7-3)
Last Week – 7
The Bucs roll as Adrian Peterson does his 2nd Annual Incredibly Shrinking Man Impersonation, just in time for the fantasy playoffs. Hey, Cadillac Williams is back!!! Not sure we missed him, but he’s back anyway.
- Arizona Cardinals (7-3)
Last Week – 9
I didn’t realize this, but Anquan Boldin’s face had to be reconstructed after his vicious injury earlier this season. Look at it this way: Boldin has a bad contract and a face that required him to see the same surgeon as the Joker, yet he is still the best WR in the league. For God’s sake, pay the man!
- Washington Redskins (6-4)
Last Week – 4
Is it just me, or did the Redskins seem especially flat this week? Jason Campbell reverted back to his old “I’m in way over my head” mode and Clinton Portis’ injury was beyond noticeable. Zorn has some offensive fixin’ to do.
- Philadelphia Eagles (6-3-1)
Last Week – 6
I know it’s been beaten to a pulp, but Donovan McNabb really didn’t know that the games could end in a tie? I admit I was a bit sketchy on the whole “tie” issue, but in my defense, I don’t get paid obscene amounts of money to play a game. Hell, I get paid no money to play fantasy football, and I know every rule forwards and backwards. He should really be ashamed of himself.
- Indianapolis Colts (6-4)
Last Week – 13
Oh God…here we go! They’re back and I couldn’t be less excited. Considering Peyton Manning, Marvin Harrison, Joseph Addai and Dallas Clark have all slaughtered countless fantasy teams thus far, how can we ever trust them again? I feel like a scorned girlfriend. Fool me once…shame on you! Let’s just say, I’m not going to be fooled twice.
- NY Jets (7-3)
Last Week – 14
As much as I hate to admit it, the Jets are red hot right now. Their offense is clicking thanks to the tremendous running game which is opening up options that Brett Favre can’t even screw-up with an INT. And their defense is keeping their opponents in check. This week against the Titans will be THE marquee matchup of the week. I predict upset city!
- New England Patriots (6-4)
Last Week – 8
Well New England, you’ve been waiting for Cassel to get his head out of his butt and what do you do? You whip-up a nice turd sandwich and let the game get away. I blame this solely on the older than dirt, Patriots defense that STILL doesn’t have a secondary. They might make a playoff run, but I see a first round exit in their future.
- Baltimore Ravens (6-4)
Last Week – 10
I feel bad for the Ravens because they were in the midst of a pretty good run where they reinserted themselves into the thick of things. Then the Giants came to town…..
They’re still good, but with a rookie QB, this team will be left in the dust.
- Dallas Cowboys (6-4)
Last Week – 16
Oh yeah….once Romo returns, the Cowboys’ team will be much MUCH better. You can take that to the bank. He IS the missing element that this team needs. T.O. will be so happy when he returns.
I’m this sarcastic...and they won. Imagine if they lost?
- Atlanta Falcons (6-4)
Last Week – 11
Hard to believe that this week was the Falcons’ first home loss. Moving along…
- Miami Dolphins (6-4)
Last Week – 17
Miami edged the Raiders with a last minute field goal. It’s a bit alarming that a game against the Raiders was this close, but Miami somehow pulled it off.
- Chicago Bears (5-5)
Last Week – 12
I’m not sure if the Packers were just that good this week or if the Bears just forgot to play? I’m leaning towards that latter, but I can’t be sure.
- Denver Broncos (6-4)
Last Week – 19
Pretty surprised the Broncos won this week considering the Falcons led in every offensive statistical category. Jay Cutler truly is the magic man.
- Green Bay Packers (5-5)
Last Week – 20
Ryan Grant is heating up and Aaron Rodgers is being very efficient with the ball. It might be too little too late for most teams, but when you are in a division that has three 5-5 teams fighting for first place, you can’t feel too bad about yourself.
- Minnesota Vikings (5-5)
Last Week – 15
By sheer luck, this team is still in the playoff hunt. Don’t worry though, Gus Frerotte has ice in his veins. If you believe that, Brad Childress has a toupee he wants to sell you.
- New Orleans Saints (5-5)
Last Week – 23
You know how an NFL team's QB usually gets his offensive line a gift at the end of the season in appreciation of their protection? I say that the New Orleans offensive line buy Drew Brees a gift after this season.
- Cleveland Browns (4-6)
Last Week – 24
Braylon Edwards leads the NFL with 13 dropped passes this season. I don’t even have a joke prepared for that.
- Buffalo Bills (5-5)
Last Week – 18
What else does Buffalo want? The conditions were perfect for a classic Buffalo-style win, in the cold snowy weather, but they let us down. This isn’t your mama’s Buffalo team.
- San Diego Chargers (4-6)
Last Week – 21
I’ve got no answers for this team. They did have a nice goal line stand this week, but other than that, they are dead – offensively and defensively.
- Jacksonville Jaguars (4-6)
Last Week – 22
D-U-N!
- San Francisco (3-7)
Last Week – 28
The 49ers won despite not scoring a single point in the second half of this week’s game against the Rams. Oh wait…I said the Rams. Nevermind, that makes sense.
- Houston Texans (3-7)
Last Week – 25
Steve Slaton is one tricky dude – just when you think he’s “tired”, he has a career day. I’m starting to think the Texans just said that so the Colts wouldn’t bother with him.
- Cincinnati Bengals (1-8-1)
Last Week – 30
This game should have been called “The Poop Bowl” because that’s the face people made when it was all over – like they were on the can making a No. 2.
- Seattle Seahawks (2-8)
Last Week – 27
Almost…but no cigar. Perhaps next season.
- St. Louis Rams (2-8)
Last Week – 27
Nope!!!
- Kansas City Chiefs (1-9)
Last Week – 29
Na-ah!!
- Oakland Raiders (2-8)
Last Week – 31
Nada!
- Detroit Lions (0-10)
Last Week – 32
Zippo!
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| Published: Nov 19, 2008 9:59 AM EST |
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